In Kenya the term 'I'm on my way' has absolutely no meaning... everyone uses it to mean I'll be there in a few minutes or maybe at the latest tomorrow. When someone says "I'm on my way" to us, we immediately try to pin it down more specifically by asking: "From where?", but of course that doesn't mean that the person you're speaking to doesn't have a few unannounced stops to make on his or her way to where you are... so even the clarification of 'from where' rarely helps.
Another non-committal type of expression common in Kenya is used whenever directions are asked of someone... such as "Where is the grocery store?"... the answer ..."Its up ahead." Trying to gauge how far 'up ahead' really is, you might then ask, "How far is it to Nairobi?" ... which would then cause you to wonder when you hear again, "It's just up ahead!" It is possible that if you were to ask someone in Africa, "Where's is the north pole?"... that you could get the same casual answer -- "Oh, it's just up ahead!"
'African time' works fine for Africans but is somewhat irritating for Westerners to get used to. African time is a vague period in which 1-2 hours late is still acceptable and considered 'on time' for church, Bible school or an important meeting or appointment. More than an hour or two late might warrant a "Polee polee" (Sorry, sorry) response from the offender with a bright smile that says, "Lighten-up, remember you're in Africa!"
The price of almost anything from a bag of mangoes to a vehicle tune-up is also flexible, and depends on factors outside of the supply & demand curves that we have come to love and rely on in the world 'Outside of Africa'. The price is generally whatever one is willing to pay for an item or service, and is adjusted according to skin color in most cases. Lowest price is for fellow tribal members, friends or family... next non-tribal members and strangers (Africans)... then Asians who own and operate many businesses in Kenya, speak Swahili and are less likely to be taken advantage of... and then foreigners or mazungus (white people). Mazungu friends pay less than mazungu strangers but of course more than Africans or Asians. With every transaction there is the idea that the quoted price is just the starting point in the negotiations for the final price. If you like to haggle over the price of everything, then this place will be a paradise for you. If you don't... then just send a trusted African friend to buy whatever it is you are needing. Even with the mark-up for his or her transportation costs, you will definitely save big time.
The key then to successful stress-free living in Africa is found in remembering two rules ... Rule #1 ... "Don't sweat the small stuff." Rule #2 ... "It's all small stuff." Distance, time and price are all relative in Africa as in quantum physics. Most people here are living on the edge of crisis and disaster daily and are hanging on by a thread most of the time. Malaria, famine, drought, disease, school fees (more on that subject later) are just a few of the things that take priority over the 'small stuff' like being on time or overcharging someone a few shillings for a bag of mangoes. We often need to just take a step back and wonder how we would cope in their situation... would we be able to smile and take things in stride and say, "Praise the LORD!" ("Bwana Asafeeway!" in Swahili), when things look like they couldn't get worse? Living in a mud hut (tukul) in Sudan for two weeks this past month made us aware of just how flexible and happy our Kenyan friends are who live in these conditions permanently without complaining.
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